There’s a viral Facebook note being posted called “25 Random Things” – or something like that. If you get tagged, you have to post it about yourself or wild leprechauns will eat your soul. Or whatever.

I long ago decided that a fad like that – chain mail or whatever – would have to be really awesome in order for me to write one. So far, I’ve avoided them.

However, I think that I have enough experiences and/or awkward moments in my life that writing a quick column about 25 or so of them should be no problem.

1. I once dropped a brick on my cousin. There was no malice involved. It was actually an accident, but that doesn’t make a very good story. Actually, this was a terrible way to start this list.

2. In fifth grade, I created a role-playing game for my entire class in which I was the ruler of the world and they were all my employees. My second-in-command rotated between my two best friends and the girl I had a crush on.

3. My heroes are kind of the weird folks of society: Weird Al, Mick Foley, Jay London – comedians in general, really.

4. General Really would be a terrible commander’s name.

5. I once fought off five giant wasps at the same time in a desert in the southern part of the continent of Kalimdor. If you don’t know what I mean, you’re blessed.

6. I have several goals in life, not the least of which is to have someone break a chair over my back.

7. I wish I could play hockey like my roommate. I would like to hit people for fun while wielding a long stick.

8. I once proposed to a girl using a Snickers bar in lieu of a ring. She said yes.

9. The girl in No. 8 doesn’t know I wasn’t kidding.

10. My brother may be the wisest person I know. At least I assume he is, because he doesn’t talk much and I know that wise people are quiet. It said so in a fortune cookie.

11. “The Office” is the funniest show on television. I wish I could be an intern in there for a day just so I could work with that cast.

12. If I could be any being, I’d be a dwarven werebear. I very much doubt there would be anything tougher. If Moria had me there, it would have never been lost to evil.

13. I’m terrified of the zombie apocalypse I know is coming.

14. I’m preparing my friends and family because of No. 13.

15. FILLER LINE

16. I have an unjustified hatred of flip-flops.

17. Gimli is my dad. So is Paul Bunyan.

19. I drink enough bottled water that I could build an entire fortress out of the empty bottles. I would name it Fort Recyclable. Terrifying.

20. I invented Hot Pockets. They involve flame and pants.

21. Communicating the Feminine in Ancient World Religions has been my favorite class at Baker. I strongly suggest everyone take it. It’s an upper-level and a gen-ed so that’s a two-fer.

22. I’m really surprised that spell-check didn’t get mad at “two-fer.”

23. I’m pleased with the way I was brought up, where I was brought up and who brung me up. Yes, I wrote “brung.”  It’s a funny sounding non-word.

24. Books are underrated.

25. I have no small amount of self-loathing for myself because of this list.