I love infomercials.

I say this with pride, as not only do they aid with my insomnia, but they also are masters in marketing. They allow an individual a chance to see new and questionable products available for purchase, enabling the economy and nation we live in to keep truckin’.

The great thing about infomercials is that everyone has their favorites. Actually, this may not be true when asking those who have never seen these gems of early morning television. In my opinion, those who are sleeping during the wee hours of the morning are missing out on these products. While some are sleeping, there are others of us watching infomercial after infomercial. Some take down the numbers of products they want to order while others watch merely for entertainment value. ?Either way it’s inexpensive fun, unless you buy the products and end up in debt. If this sounds like you, I would suggest a support group.

One of my personal favorites is for the Ronco Electric Food Dehydrator. I’m not sure whether it’s the fact that this machine dries the food or that Ron Popeil has marketed this product as an amazing invention. Sure, leaving food in the heat to remove the water in it sounds basic and almost boring, but the infomercial for the product makes it sound amazing and invigorating. People are so excited and amazed with the dried fruit and dried meat coming out of the drying cylinder it makes me excited by association. ?I’ve been very close to picking up the phone and dialing the number to place my order but I am lacking in the credit card department, which has saved me from infomercial debt.

My brother has a favorite, too: the Magic Bullet. Sometimes he calls me and asks if the infomercial is on just so he can sit there and watch it. Who could blame him? It’s a small blender you can make quiche, pancakes, and smoothies in. It would make the perfect gift for people who like to make quiche, pancakes, and smoothies, but hate having to do so without a gadget. The actual commercial itself is pretty entertaining, too. There is a woman in a house dress smoking her cigarette, but not ashing it while talking to the hosts. If you haven’t seen it, I suggest it. ?We can discuss later.

Of course, there are also some problems with infomercials. Some products advertised seem like they wouldn’t work or seem overpriced. There is a product on television telling me to pour my hot water into a plastic tube with my pasta and it will cook for me. Another shows the audience how much money they can save by buying at-home hair cutting supplies which can be used on children and dogs alike.

These products are not as entertaining and, to be honest, I don’t want my hair to be trimmed with the same utensils cutting the hair of a dog. Perhaps a city dog taken care of by a socialite, but not a country dog who spends its time chasing cattle and rolling in manure. The price of some products can make your jaw drop, but just don’t buy the products you can’t afford. Just live vicariously through people on the program.

There is something amazing about all these products on television, many of which cost varying numbers of easy payments of $19.99. Sometimes I wonder who exactly the products are being marketed to, but in the end it really doesn’t matter. All I know is it gives me the opportunity to watch an overly enthusiastic host (sometimes with an obviously fake accent) sing the praises of something I have never and probably will never need.

As long as I have something to watch on television after MTV has started playing music videos, I’m content.